idealism and realism

 

some tunes

 

 

I had a dream last night about, something. I don't actually remember the majority but normally you don't remember anything but small clips. This particular clip was horrible. I was running towards a door in a hospital, what I can only think of as 'The Exit', but as soon as I reached it a dawning feeling came over my dreaming head everything slowed down. It was the fear of being institusionalised as Red from Shaweshank Redemption would say. Don't ask me why, no idea whatsoever but that was the dream. But that leads in to the thought of the half-week I'd say,

 

 

Theme of the week: Idyllic realities

 

 

Everyone at some point imagines the idealistic reality they would like to appear but sometimes if not most it turns out to just be plain old reality. There's not a lot to say on the subject when asking whether people with more idealism then realistic thoughts are the prefered, if that made any sense. But there is the question of what part of our minds makes the decisions to hope for the best? It's quiete obvious to say that when something is about to happen you imagine the good reality and only eventually do you fear the worst. An example might help: I'm really in to English Literature and after re-taking the first year exam at college I achieved a B. However this lead my stupid idealistic mind to believe it could easily achieve the same thing. This did not happen and I'm not planning the re-take. But it was only a month or so after I'd taken the last ever Literature exam that the thought of reality sprung out of nowhere. Still with me? Basically we get easily distracted and very disappointed because of our idealistic minds.

 

If you have read Jane Austen's Sense & Sensibility then Marianne is practically the character that springs to mind. But if you haven't Marianne is basically the Sensibility part, she will allow her emotions and her imagination to lead her thoughts and actions without cause for reality. This is much the point to F. Scott Fitzgerald's Jay Gatsby in The Great Gatsby if you have read that. They both mantain what's known as the Romantic stereotype. Please google it it's a very beautiful idea that people can convey themselves as truley Romantic. Also look up John Clare on it if you're really that bored/interested.

 

As warned I go on and on, so yeah the end result of this thought is to shove earphones in and day dream again. I'd totally forgotten what idealistic values I did have when in the learning days so it's kind of come back and I'm allowing thetic emotions back through reading again! Yes reading, is something I used to do and have retured to as one of my friends might phrase it. But this is rather a long post so next time I might brag how amazing this mystery book is and what it's doing to my life...

 

Au Revoir!

 



 



a little inlightenment

Here's a little music, if you wish.

 

Hello or Bonjour either way. I'm new to writing anything really except essays and although there's hardly anyone reading this it's a bit of something new. The main reason to starting something this weird idea is my friend, as this certain person continues their blog because of her interest in photography. I'm pretty rubbish behind a camera so this is not like that, but I have other interests so this is mainly just thoughts of the week and the common areas of a poorly aspiring writer (books, films etc.) It's not to everyones particular interest to listen to losers but sorry it's not really for you, or at least for now it's not. In some strange way it might try to recover my sane mind and not become insane because at the moment every thought is bottled like a bursting champagne bottle, crap imagery there but I can try.

 

Theme of the week: Careers and basically the future

 

It's not just this week but ergh it's everywhere at the moment. Even though I'm eighteen it's still like asking when I was ten "what do you want to do?" Anything? Everything! But no, that's just not going to happen. I've mentioned this to a few of my friends, it feels as though people started some kind of race and finished without even telling me it's started. Most of our group have gone to different parts of England to University. They are studying both things that interest them and the subject which can conclude with a job they might actually want. Which is great, who wouldn't want that? Some people may not actually need a degree to do what they choose. In fact one of my friends wants to be a theatre technician of some kind and has succeded lately in I suppose "getting her foot in the door". It's astounding that my friends have planned and ultimatley focused on what they need to do, to which they are succeeding. But that's where the awkward one comes in. Me. Hello! Basically I'm both lazy and difficult resulting in no entry to University to do something and at the moment unemployment (technically my own fault because I quit-- I'm so lazy).

 

This thought of the week just results in me sitting down most likely with a cat and discussing (important fact: I'm a loser who talks to my cats) what the plan is. The plan so far is to look into University. At first it was just English Literature BA Hons but after little research I have learnt you can combine etc. Recently I would like some kind of Drama/Acting course because you should do what you love doing, which is that exactly. So I found loads of courses which do this which I need to apply to UCAS and try to convince people I'm worth the effort even with my lazy grades from A Level (BDD). Plus I have to get a job to be able to do anything. Car - Needs petrol - Need money for that. Go out with beautiful friends - Need money for that as well. My palm slaps my forehead and I sigh a giant breath of "I need to sort this out".

 

I do ramble, this blog will include lots about my lovely cats (all three of them), this is mainly for my sanity and for my general interests which either way if you decided to read I will apologise. It's just the way life's going at the moment. Sorry x